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- A Memorial
- Merlin
- My Monster & Big Baby
January 29, 1998 - July 31, 2007
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 Today
is a very sad day at SpringWolf.com. After a long battle with
cancer, we're faced with letting our precious hybrid wolf, Merlin,
go to the spirit realm. It's never an easy decision to let go
of one you love. And a decision that any person who loves and
adores their animal family members always wrestle with. But on
July 31st, we said good bye to the best friend and companion
who has walked on this spiritual path with me.
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- Merlin has been the best friend and member of our family
that I've ever had. Along with his Dalmatian sister Destinie
that is. He was so big that just his size would scare people.
It was long before I started calling him my Monster or Monster
Merlin. The 3 of us often woke up and had a wonderful good morning
howl, what I would always call our morning song. We would go
to bed and howl a nice night-time song as well. The tradition
continued when our son, Aidan, was born. He would come into our
room and join in on the howling. And that's just one of the things
I'm going to miss most.
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- As big as he was, he always thought he was just a little
puppy, a lap dog, a snugly little guy who wanted to lay next
you or rub up against you like a cat. Only his rub would knock
you over. When he wanted your attention he would push his big
ole head into the palm of your hand until you scratched him.
 When
he wanted something and you didn't respond fast enough, he'd
take his huge paws and grab onto your arm. Then he'd pull you
toward him and inevidably put a big scratch on you. He never
meant to hurt anyone, he just never realized how big and strong
he really was.
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- When he was lost for 7 weeks in 2001, I was heart broken.
I never thought we'd find him. But thanks to the work of my sister
Pam, Alexandria Animal Control and the Arlington Police, we found
him. A cop saw him wander into a gated apartment complex and
called animal control. Who alerted Alexandria Animal Control
who contacted Pam. We jumped in the car and took off to find
him. When we arrived in the parking lot he was sitting under
a tree just watching the people coming and going. As I started
for him, calling his name, he started to get up and run away.
I stopped started howling and asked him if he wanted to come
home. The howl was all we needed to talk to each other and he
quickly started for me. The closer he got, the lower to the ground
he got. By the time he reached me, he was practically crawling
and crawled right into my lap. And knocked me over backwards.
While he got out a couple times at the new house on the lake,
he never went very far. That 7 week escapade taught him a lot
I think and he never wanted to be far from home.
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- The day that he, Destinie and I moved into our new house
on the lake he was already nervous. He walked through the front
door and quickly looked for a way out. He jumped onto the kitchen
counter to jump out the window over the kitchen sink. It took
a few seconds to grab hold of him and get him calmed down. Once
he got a few of the familiar scents of me and Destinie, he started
to settle down. And I think he really loved it here. Sitting
in the back yard taking in all the smells of nature, the lake
and the wild life has kept him entertained.
- For as big and scary as he was, he really was a wuss. He
would much rather sit upstairs in the loft in his own palisade.
Looking down into the living room at the comings and goings.
Watching any guests who visited with hawk eyes. Or relaxing and
gazing through the railings into the back yard and wild life
that surrounds the lake.
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- Many times we would let him out in the fall or winter and
he would lay in the middle of the yard sniffing the breeze. Even
at night beneath the flood lights, he liked relaxing under the
stars and cooling off. Unless there was snow on the ground. Then
it was being outside and rolling in the snow that he liked. His
other favorite place to be was in the corner of the loft looking
down into the living room. His own little palisade in the world.
He would watch all the comings and goings, people coming to visit
or even just lay there and look out the back windows at the yard
and lake beyond. It was I think his contented place.
- Everyone was worried when we brought the baby home from the
hospital. Not me. Merlin took Aidan like jelly to peanut butter.
He loved the new baby member of our pack. When Gary would change
Aidan's diaper, there was inevitably a bit of crying and screaming,
from the baby that is. Merlin would sit at the end of the bed
and growl at Gary, as if to say, you keep hurting my baby and
I'm going to beat you up.
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- One day just as Aidan was learning how to roll himself over,
Gary and I had him on our bed. I went to drop the diaper into
the trash and thought Gary was standing behind me. Gary was grabbing
something from the crib and thought I was next to the bed. Just
then Aidan decided to roll over and he was on his way off the
side of the bed. But Merlin was there and took his big long nose
and pushed the baby back onto the bed just as I came back into
the room. I knew there was no way anyone was going to believe
that and do wish we had video of it. But it was one of many moments
lost to time.
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- He had his own way of doing things and many little rituals
he had for going to bed, going outside and waiting for me to
come home from work. He and Destinie both had to have their time
sleeping on the bed with me at night. Without Gary being there
that is. If they didn't get that time, Merlin would be restless
for most of the night. They both knew when it was close to time
for me to be home. Many times Gary would tell me about the two
of them making their way to the front door, or the door to the
living room where they could keep an eye on the front door just
a few minutes before I would arrive.
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- Somehow they both always seemed to know when Friday had rolled
around and it was time for Pizza night. They often knew exactly
when the pizza guys were coming just before they pulled into
the drive way.
 Merlin was very shy
around people. Except when the Pizza guy or girl came. Then it
was into the kitchen and for a few of them, he would go right
up to them and even let one or two of them pet his head. That
was a big deal for Merlin.
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He's also immortalized as the logo for SpringWolf.com and SpringWolf
Designs. And his image will always be present on the many sites
I've designed for customers and friends.
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- In April 2007 Merlin was diagnosed with nasal cancer. It's
been a very emotional road, but we fought this terrible disease
as long as possible. I just couldn't stand to see him deteriorate
and Gary and I both knew it was time to let him go. He's such
a part of me, I don't know what I'm going to do without him.
I love this big goof so much and he will always be my big baby.
It's so very hard to say good-bye.
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Two more of my favorite pictures
 
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The day was made worse as we were getting ready to say good-bye
to Merlin when my sister called. To let us know that her baby
Shadow had collapsed that morning and left us on the same day.
July 2007 has been a very terrible month for us. We lost Odie,
Shadow, and Merlin. All our big babies!
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Have Visited Merlin |
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