A Memorial
Merlin
My Monster & Big Baby
January 29, 1998 - July 31, 2007

 
Today is a very sad day at SpringWolf.com. After a long battle with cancer, we're faced with letting our precious hybrid wolf, Merlin, go to the spirit realm. It's never an easy decision to let go of one you love. And a decision that any person who loves and adores their animal family members always wrestle with. But on July 31st, we said good bye to the best friend and companion who has walked on this spiritual path with me.
 
Merlin has been the best friend and member of our family that I've ever had. Along with his Dalmatian sister Destinie that is. He was so big that just his size would scare people. It wasn't long before I started calling him my Monster or Monster Merlin. Merlin, Destinie and I would often wake up and have a wonderful good morning howl, what I would always call our morning song. We would go to bed and howl a nice night-time song as well. The tradition continued when our son, was born. He would come into our room and join in on the howling. And that's just one of the things I'm going to miss most.
 
As big as he was, he always thought he was just a little puppy, a lap dog, a snugly little guy who wanted to lay next to you or rub up against you like a cat. Only his rub would knock you over. When he wanted your attention he would push his big ole head into the palm of your hand until you scratched him. When he wanted something and you didn't respond fast enough, he'd take his huge paws and grab onto your arm. Then he'd pull you toward him and inevitably put a big scratch on you. He never meant to hurt anyone, he just never realized how big and strong he really was.
 
When he was lost for 7 weeks in 2001, I was heart broken. I never thought we'd find him. But thanks to the work of my sister Pam, Alexandria Animal Control and the Arlington Police, we found him. A cop saw him wander into a gaited apartment complex and called animal control. Who alerted Alexandria Animal Control who contacted Pam. We jumped in the car and took off to find him. When we arrived in the parking lot he was sitting under a tree just watching the people coming and going. As I started for him, calling his name, he started to get up and run away. I stopped started howling and asked him if he wanted to come home. The howl was all we needed to talk to each other and he quickly started for me. The closer he got, the lower to the ground he got. By the time he reached me, he was practically crawling and crawled right into my lap. And knocked me over backwards. While he got out a couple times at the new house on the lake, he never went very far. That 7 week escapade taught him a lot I think and he never wanted to be far from home.
 
The day that he, Destinie and I moved into our new house on the lake he was already nervous. He walked through the front door and quickly looked for a way out. He jumped onto the kitchen counter to jump out the window over the kitchen sink. It took a few seconds to grab hold of him and get him calmed down. But once he got a few of the familiar scents of me and Destinie, he started to settle down. And I think he really loved it here. Sitting in the back yard taking in all the smells of nature, the lake and the wild life kept him entertained.
For as big and scary as he was, he really was a wuss. He would much rather sit upstairs in the loft in his own palisade. Looking down into the living room at the comings and goings of family and friends who visited. He would watching any guests who visited with hawk eyes through the railings. Or he would just relax and gaze out the windows into the back yard and the wild life that surrounds the lake.
 
Many times we would let him out in the fall or winter and he would lay in the middle of the yard sniffing the breeze. Even at night beneath the flood lights, he liked relaxing under the stars and cooling off. Unless there was snow on the ground. Then it was being outside and rolling in the snow that he liked.
 
But his favorite place to be was in the corner of the loft looking down into the living room. His own little place in the world.
Everyone was worried when we brought our son home from the hospital. Not me. Merlin took to the Munchkin like jelly to peanut butter. He loved the new baby member of our pack. When Gary would change the baby's diaper, there was inevitably a bit of crying and screaming, from the baby that is. Merlin would sit at the end of the bed and growl at Gary, as if to say, you keep hurting my baby and I'm going to beat you up.
 
One day just as the Munchkin was learning how to roll himself over, Gary and I had him on our bed. I went to drop the diaper into the trash and thought Gary was standing behind me. Gary was grabbing something from the crib and thought I was next to the bed. Just then the baby decided to roll over and he was on his way off the side of the bed. But Merlin was there and took his big long nose and pushed the baby back onto the bed just as I came back into the room. I knew there was no way anyone was going to believe that and do wish we had video of it. But it was one of many moments lost to time. And just the perfect example of how Merlin loved that kid.
 
He had his own way of doing things and many little rituals he had for going to bed, going outside and waiting for me to come home from work. He and Destinie both had to have their time sleeping on the bed with me at night. Without Gary being there that is. If they didn't get that time, Merlin would be restless for most of the night. They both knew when it was close to time for me to be home. Many times Gary would tell me about the two of them making their way to the front door, or the door to the living room where they could keep an eye on the front door just a few minutes before I would arrive.
 
Somehow they both always seemed to know when Friday had rolled around and it was time for Pizza night. They often knew exactly when the pizza guys were coming just before they pulled into the drive way. Merlin was very shy around people. Except when the Pizza guy or girl came. Then it was into the kitchen and for a few of them, he would go right up to them and even let one or two of them pet his head. That was a big deal for Merlin.
 
He's also immortalized as the logo for SpringWolf.com and SpringWolf Designs. And his image will always be present on the many sites I've designed for customers and friends; and for myself. Most recently for my author website Springwolf.net
In April 2007 Merlin was diagnosed with nasal cancer. It's been a very emotional road, but we fought this terrible disease as long as possible. I just couldn't stand to see him deteriorate and Gary and I both knew it was time to let him go. He's such a part of me, I don't know what I'm going to do without him. I love this big goof so much and he will always be my big baby. It's so very hard to say good-bye.

  Two more of my favorite pictures

 
The day was made worse as we were getting ready to say good-bye to Merlin when my sister called. To let us know that her baby Shadow had collapsed that morning and left us on the same day. July 2007 has been a very terrible month for us. We lost Odie, Shadow, and Merlin within just a few weeks of other. They all grew up together as Pam and I shared a house for several years. Odie, Shadow and Destinie were Merlin's harem. Now they can always be together in Doggie Heaven. We're going to miss All our big babies!
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Have Visited Merlin

 


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